My love affair with music started very early in my life. My first albums were Culture Club and Prince's Purple Rain. My first tape was DOC. My first cd was Color Me Badd. I know, I know. You cannot clown me for that one. 'I Wanna Sex You Up' was the jam back then. My music taste is vast and open to anything that sounds good to me including country and heavy metal.
I grew up on MTV. Therefore, I loved Duran Duran, Billy Idol, Devo and Cyndi Lauper. The house I grew up in always had music going. My grandfather was a jazz enthusiast. He loved John Coltrane, Billie Holiday, Cab Calloway, Charlie 'Bird' Parker among others. My grandmother loved B. B. King and Bobby 'Blue' Bland. Blues was always playing on the record player on Saturdays as we cleaned the house. My uncle was a funk man. He loved the Funkadelics, Bar-Kays, Parliament, and Bootsy Collins. Yes, it was 'One Nation Under Funk' for him. My aunt would play the Top 8 at 8 from 98.5 (before it was oldies but goodies station) and she had this record that I eventually stole, Sugar Hill Gang's 'Rapper's Delight.' I played that record out on my little record box. When I went by my mom's place, she would play the soulful sounds of Marvin Gaye, Commodores, Ashford & Simpson and others. She also like the Carpenters, the Beatles and Rolling Stones.
I was really open to music back then. It didn't matter as long as it sound good. When I was about five years old, my favorite singers were Kenny Rogers and Donna Summer. Yes, Kenny Rogers. I watched 'The Gambler' over and over because of that song. Donna Summer was just so funky and fun. 'Last Dance' is still one of my favorite songs of all-time. As I grew up I began to get into hip-hop. The great thing since I was from the South I listened to everything. It was no coast wars here. I loved NWA and Pharcyde just as much as I loved A Tribe Called Quest and Public Enemy. Everyone was bringing something different to hip-hop. I listened to KRS-One, Kool Moe Dee, LL Cool J, Kwame and Queen Latifah. As hip-hop evolved I evolved with it. When Outkast came out, I was like, 'Wow!' But I was into 3-6 Mafia before the Oscar, Geto Boys and Scarface and UGK. Around the time I graduated from high school there was more and more hip-hop artists coming from the South and New Orleans in particular like Mystikal and Master P. I bought Master P just because he was from New Orleans and on the national scene. I was making the people at University of Oklahoma say "UUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!" I repped hard for my city in the OK.
I continue to love music. I just purchased Reflection Eternal's (Talib Kweli and DJ Hi-Tek) new single, Back Again, jazz artist Diana Krall, and Laura Izibor. My taste still is growing. Everyday I listen to music and realize how wonderful it unites people. That's my mission in life. I want to bring people together particularly in my hometown, New Orleans. New Orleans is still hurting since the devastation of Hurricane Katrina and its aftermath. It's going to be what unites us to make a full recovery possible. What unites us is this city, New Orleans. There's nothing like her in the rest of the world. It's the gumbo of people that makes this city so wonderful. Let's celebrate this diversity with everything we do.
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Real Fathers, Please Stand Up
Sunday was Father's Day. I've never celebrated Father's Day too much. I really never had a father. My dad would come in and out my life. When I was 14, I was tired of it. I couldn't deal with my dad anymore. It was 1990, and the only father I knew, my grandfather had died from his long battle with leukemia. I was devastated. And here comes my dad trying to charm his way back to my life. Since he wasn't my grandfather, I didn't want it.
Years passed, and my dad tried again. I was 20. I'd said to myself that my grandfather would want me to try to have a relationship with him. I felt guilty because my dad was reaching out. I allowed him back into my life. This was a defining time in my life. I'd just accepted myself as a lesbian. I was out to my mother and maternal side of the family. I was spending time with my dad, but I didn't tell him. I didn't feel compel to tell him. One night after working on his computer he asked me with a shotgun to my head. In that moment I felt strong and said, "Yes, I like girls." He wanted me to get out of his house. That was fine, but he drove me there. All I wanted was for him to bring me back where he found me, my house. In his twisted mind, the reason I was a lesbian was because he wasn't in my life. With that reasoning it was his fault not mine.
Was I such a bad kid? Was I too ugly for him (even though I'm in his image)? Was he ashamed of me? He wasn't in my life. But that was just fine. For the first fourteen years of my life I had my grandfather. He gave me the love, support and encouragement. Then my uncles were always in my life. As I got older, some uncles understood more than others. Regardless I had them for support. I was always more comfortable around guys. Even when I was kid, I was on playing basketball with the big boys. It was natural for me to have men as friends as I grew up. I've got this group of guys who are like my brothers.
On Sunday I didn't call my dad to tell him 'Happy Father's Day.' While he's a better man today then he was, he's never been a father to me. It's okay because I have men around me who shows me what fatherhood is about. I texted them. I called them because they are fathers. I should have called my uncle who doesn't have any kids, but he has given me love and support when my father should have. I celebrate Father's Day with men who has done the work and continue to do the work out of love. Real fathers, please stand up.
Years passed, and my dad tried again. I was 20. I'd said to myself that my grandfather would want me to try to have a relationship with him. I felt guilty because my dad was reaching out. I allowed him back into my life. This was a defining time in my life. I'd just accepted myself as a lesbian. I was out to my mother and maternal side of the family. I was spending time with my dad, but I didn't tell him. I didn't feel compel to tell him. One night after working on his computer he asked me with a shotgun to my head. In that moment I felt strong and said, "Yes, I like girls." He wanted me to get out of his house. That was fine, but he drove me there. All I wanted was for him to bring me back where he found me, my house. In his twisted mind, the reason I was a lesbian was because he wasn't in my life. With that reasoning it was his fault not mine.
Was I such a bad kid? Was I too ugly for him (even though I'm in his image)? Was he ashamed of me? He wasn't in my life. But that was just fine. For the first fourteen years of my life I had my grandfather. He gave me the love, support and encouragement. Then my uncles were always in my life. As I got older, some uncles understood more than others. Regardless I had them for support. I was always more comfortable around guys. Even when I was kid, I was on playing basketball with the big boys. It was natural for me to have men as friends as I grew up. I've got this group of guys who are like my brothers.
On Sunday I didn't call my dad to tell him 'Happy Father's Day.' While he's a better man today then he was, he's never been a father to me. It's okay because I have men around me who shows me what fatherhood is about. I texted them. I called them because they are fathers. I should have called my uncle who doesn't have any kids, but he has given me love and support when my father should have. I celebrate Father's Day with men who has done the work and continue to do the work out of love. Real fathers, please stand up.
Friday, June 19, 2009
Getting It Off My Chest
I'm an avid sports enthusiast. I love sports. I played basketball for years. I stopped my senior year because I didn't think my knee would hold up in college. I've been watching all of the sports news this week. I'm upset about the treatment of Michael Vick. Did he not pay his debt to society? One of my friends wanted me to join a group called Permanently Ban Michael Vick from the NFL. I understand that she is an animal supporter, but I think the U.S. cares more about animals than humans. The media crucified Michael Vick during the allegations. It was obvious that he was guilty until proven innocent. Hmm, that is so un-American.
This week Donte Stallworth was sentenced to 30 days of jail time and 2 year house arrest for vehicular manslaughter (DUI). His lawyer said that this was a fair punishment. He murdered a man. Michael Vick murdered dogs, and he was given 19 months in jail. There's a disparity between the two. I know some would say that Vick's crime lasted longer than Stallworth's. There's no money that can bring back this father and husband. NONE! I just don't understand this sentence for Stallworth. The media talks about the Donte Stallworth's case, but it is more in the context of NFL and Goddell's control of 'bad' behavior.
Michael Vick has paid his debt to society. If a NFL team wants to sign him, then that's on that team. Vick is a talented individual who has done some stupid, outlandish things. I don't hear about the Enron executive get crucified as Michael Vick has. Enron executives destroyed thousands of lives. America has a selective memory because Enron executives are no longer talked about. However, Michael Vick has served his prison time, and people still have great disdain for him. We shouldn't judge him. We should pray for him because he needs it. Yes, he was a multi-millionaire, but he is still a human being. He is still a child of God. I think we forget that when we criticize and judge. We should look for the good in everyone. Instead of criticizing, we should pray for these young athletes that get all of this money and have no clue how to handle the pressure or the money. We are not in that position at all. I just had to get that off my chest.
This week Donte Stallworth was sentenced to 30 days of jail time and 2 year house arrest for vehicular manslaughter (DUI). His lawyer said that this was a fair punishment. He murdered a man. Michael Vick murdered dogs, and he was given 19 months in jail. There's a disparity between the two. I know some would say that Vick's crime lasted longer than Stallworth's. There's no money that can bring back this father and husband. NONE! I just don't understand this sentence for Stallworth. The media talks about the Donte Stallworth's case, but it is more in the context of NFL and Goddell's control of 'bad' behavior.
Michael Vick has paid his debt to society. If a NFL team wants to sign him, then that's on that team. Vick is a talented individual who has done some stupid, outlandish things. I don't hear about the Enron executive get crucified as Michael Vick has. Enron executives destroyed thousands of lives. America has a selective memory because Enron executives are no longer talked about. However, Michael Vick has served his prison time, and people still have great disdain for him. We shouldn't judge him. We should pray for him because he needs it. Yes, he was a multi-millionaire, but he is still a human being. He is still a child of God. I think we forget that when we criticize and judge. We should look for the good in everyone. Instead of criticizing, we should pray for these young athletes that get all of this money and have no clue how to handle the pressure or the money. We are not in that position at all. I just had to get that off my chest.
Compassion vs. Niceness... Vote for Compassion
I woke up with an epiphany. I've been too nice too long. I've allowed myself to be a doormat for others. I've been walked on in the name of 'niceness.' Not anymore. A. Kenyatta Parks does not play that sh*t. I cannot. If my niceness leaves me depleted, it has an adverse effect. For years I was trying to martyr by helping everyone else. I've set up boundaries for everyone in my life. I know when I have had enough. I speak up for myself because no one else will.
For years I tried to be nice because of my insecurities and fears. I didn't think anyone would want to be around me because of me. I used my 'niceness' to lure them in, but often I felt used. I couldn't be compassionate with others because I wasn't compassionate with myself. Everything starts with yourself even compassion. I often did nice things to get my desired result. I couldn't help anyone else until I realized how wonderful and powerful I was. It's interesting as I've been embarking on this spiritual journey of how I've learned so much about myself. I've been focusing on others for so long that I forgot about myself.
It's time to take my life back. It's time to be nice to myself. Often, I found it difficult to be compassionate when I felt hurt and when there wasn't any closure. I have to set up my boundaries and be open with others about their boundaries. I can effectively say, 'NO,' without remorse. I'm learning to be compassionate. I can demonstrate compassion when I take others' feeling into consideration while not trampling over my own in the process. I know now that I am powerful enough to give what I have without losing anything. In my compassion for others I am making myself stronger.
For years I tried to be nice because of my insecurities and fears. I didn't think anyone would want to be around me because of me. I used my 'niceness' to lure them in, but often I felt used. I couldn't be compassionate with others because I wasn't compassionate with myself. Everything starts with yourself even compassion. I often did nice things to get my desired result. I couldn't help anyone else until I realized how wonderful and powerful I was. It's interesting as I've been embarking on this spiritual journey of how I've learned so much about myself. I've been focusing on others for so long that I forgot about myself.
It's time to take my life back. It's time to be nice to myself. Often, I found it difficult to be compassionate when I felt hurt and when there wasn't any closure. I have to set up my boundaries and be open with others about their boundaries. I can effectively say, 'NO,' without remorse. I'm learning to be compassionate. I can demonstrate compassion when I take others' feeling into consideration while not trampling over my own in the process. I know now that I am powerful enough to give what I have without losing anything. In my compassion for others I am making myself stronger.
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Be a Diamond, Not Just a Lump of Coal
A diamond is a lump of coal that does well under pressure. In times of adversity may we all shine as brightly.
This is true about every person in the world. Pressure comes from every direction, work, dreams, family, friends, and the like. Many of us fold to the pressure and remain coal. Others use pressure as a springboard to their 'shining.' The difference between the two is faith in something bigger than them. It's understanding that your current situation does not have to be your life. It's your choice to change it. The Divine allows trials and tribulations to happen to see how much faith you have in Divinity and yourself. You are Divinity incarnated. Always remember that!
At times I would ask people for help with my dreams. They would say they would do this or that. I would get upset when they didn't do it. I would stop the process of growing. I would stop doing what I set out to do. Working under pressure is contagious when others see progression. Don't stop when others do especially if that is your dream. You would love help from others, but it's your dream. You need to do whatever you need to do to attain it. It is harder, but the reward is greater as well. Keep your head up. You can do what you need to do.
I've stopped before on my dreams when I thought others bailed out on me. It's my dream. I don't get upset anymore. I continue to do what I need to work on my dreams. If that's doing everything so be it. I have to fulfill my dreams. Help comes when you least expect it. We have to continue to push on. I'm turning into to a beautiful diamond. What about you? I only hang with diamonds. See the diamond in yourself so we can shine so brightly together.
This is true about every person in the world. Pressure comes from every direction, work, dreams, family, friends, and the like. Many of us fold to the pressure and remain coal. Others use pressure as a springboard to their 'shining.' The difference between the two is faith in something bigger than them. It's understanding that your current situation does not have to be your life. It's your choice to change it. The Divine allows trials and tribulations to happen to see how much faith you have in Divinity and yourself. You are Divinity incarnated. Always remember that!
At times I would ask people for help with my dreams. They would say they would do this or that. I would get upset when they didn't do it. I would stop the process of growing. I would stop doing what I set out to do. Working under pressure is contagious when others see progression. Don't stop when others do especially if that is your dream. You would love help from others, but it's your dream. You need to do whatever you need to do to attain it. It is harder, but the reward is greater as well. Keep your head up. You can do what you need to do.
I've stopped before on my dreams when I thought others bailed out on me. It's my dream. I don't get upset anymore. I continue to do what I need to work on my dreams. If that's doing everything so be it. I have to fulfill my dreams. Help comes when you least expect it. We have to continue to push on. I'm turning into to a beautiful diamond. What about you? I only hang with diamonds. See the diamond in yourself so we can shine so brightly together.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Being Wealthy Has NOTHING to do with Money
I woke up today and realized how free I am. I am not free because I have stacks of money. Sometimes that is limiting. I am free because I have the right to choose. Often I hear freedom and the acquisition of money are in the same breathe. They are not the same. Actually it is far from it. The acquisition of money can be restricting. A lot of times particularly African-Americans have to create a mirage of position. Why? I do not understand. I've learned to say I don't have it. I am not ashamed. It doesn't limit me because I've learned ways to enjoy myself without money. Remember when we were young we created fun because we didn't have. Let's go back to that! I refuse to try to keep up with the Joneses especially in this economy. Keeping up with the Joneses will have you broke. If the Joneses are your friends they love you with or without the BMW or Rolex. Then ask yourself, "Would the Divine care if you had a BMW or a Rolex?" If it's no, then it doesn't mean what those Joneses think.
I thought that having money would solve my problems. If I only had a million dollars, I thought my life would be better. Mo' money, mo' problems! Family members and friends think that you can provide whenever, whatever or however they need it. You don't know who loves you for you and not your money. It seems that money complicates things. I am not saying that I will turn down money because I know my worth. I am not striving to make more money, but I know that money does not equal to joy. Being joyful has nothing to do with money because it comes from within. Being joyful is knowing that through trials and tribulations that there's a lesson to learn and nothing else. When bad things happen to us we shouldn't harp on them and let it hinder us from moving forward.
When I read that money is the root of all evil, I do not agree. If the acquisition of money is your purpose in life, then there's something wrong with that. Money is a man-made entity. I feel wealthy right now because I have friends and family that believed in me even when I didn't believe in myself. As I've stated in other blogs, we have everything we need right now. We have the talents and intelligence to do whatever we are born to do. My friends have a wealth of knowledge that we share with each other. By sharing this knowledge we understand that we all have something to offer. I continue to learn and share. Now I have to share with the world my wealth. The time is now. Here I go!
I thought that having money would solve my problems. If I only had a million dollars, I thought my life would be better. Mo' money, mo' problems! Family members and friends think that you can provide whenever, whatever or however they need it. You don't know who loves you for you and not your money. It seems that money complicates things. I am not saying that I will turn down money because I know my worth. I am not striving to make more money, but I know that money does not equal to joy. Being joyful has nothing to do with money because it comes from within. Being joyful is knowing that through trials and tribulations that there's a lesson to learn and nothing else. When bad things happen to us we shouldn't harp on them and let it hinder us from moving forward.
When I read that money is the root of all evil, I do not agree. If the acquisition of money is your purpose in life, then there's something wrong with that. Money is a man-made entity. I feel wealthy right now because I have friends and family that believed in me even when I didn't believe in myself. As I've stated in other blogs, we have everything we need right now. We have the talents and intelligence to do whatever we are born to do. My friends have a wealth of knowledge that we share with each other. By sharing this knowledge we understand that we all have something to offer. I continue to learn and share. Now I have to share with the world my wealth. The time is now. Here I go!
Monday, June 15, 2009
Respect Everyone!
Good morning, world. I have awaken to new possibilities and growth. I am willing to be patient with myself and others. We are all learning and growing into our own. Yet sometimes it seems some people are stuck on stupid. These people could have their doctorate like "Early" (Dwan, thank you for that one). These people could be president of a country (See former President). It does not matter what their profession are, but they feel like they are better because of their position or labels. Labels does not mean anything to me when I am having a conversation. What a person can bring to the conversation is the only thing I will base their worthiness on. I've met people, and the first thing out of their mouth is what do you do for a living. My career does not supersede who I am.
When I decided to go back to college (after graduating with an Engineering degree), I worked at a coffee shop. Many of the people I met there were in school as well. Some people could not understand why I was so loved by many. I will tell you people. I am wonderful. I am intelligent. Some say sexy. You know I have to agree. I am charming. But most of all, I am true to myself. When some wondered why I was so popular, I just smiled and shrugged because they didn't know greatness when they saw it. How stupid is that! (Smile!) No one has to belittle others to show how great they are. These are insecurities. I used to have them, but I never belittled anyone to show how wonderful I was. That is sick.
Therefore, I welcome all who has something to say to my circle of associates. Very few can get in my circle of friends. I welcome all to come try because this circle is wonderful. I welcome healthy conversation and debates. I welcome all who has convictions and knowledge about life and love. I welcome you. For the people who turn their noses up to some (for lack of education, others), the ones you pass up going up and the same ones you will pass up coming down. Remember that! Respect all, for everyone is a Divine creation.
When I decided to go back to college (after graduating with an Engineering degree), I worked at a coffee shop. Many of the people I met there were in school as well. Some people could not understand why I was so loved by many. I will tell you people. I am wonderful. I am intelligent. Some say sexy. You know I have to agree. I am charming. But most of all, I am true to myself. When some wondered why I was so popular, I just smiled and shrugged because they didn't know greatness when they saw it. How stupid is that! (Smile!) No one has to belittle others to show how great they are. These are insecurities. I used to have them, but I never belittled anyone to show how wonderful I was. That is sick.
Therefore, I welcome all who has something to say to my circle of associates. Very few can get in my circle of friends. I welcome all to come try because this circle is wonderful. I welcome healthy conversation and debates. I welcome all who has convictions and knowledge about life and love. I welcome you. For the people who turn their noses up to some (for lack of education, others), the ones you pass up going up and the same ones you will pass up coming down. Remember that! Respect all, for everyone is a Divine creation.
Sunday, June 14, 2009
To the one...
When do you know that you've met the one? Yes, I am talking about the one who you will spend the rest of your life with. Yes, this person will learn more about you than almost anybody else. I've been in a few relationships, and I've given my heart when I shouldn't have. I've broken hearts. I've had my heart cracked. It never was broken because I don't think I gave myself totally. I never gave a woman the real me. I always saved that for my friends. I guess I never truly fell in love until now.
I've been playing the field. I'm willing to give myself to her. Yes, her. She is the one that allow me to be myself. She understands that I need my space and gives it to me. She does not call me when I am out late. All she asks is that I come home. Home. That is where she is. She created this home for me. I took her for granted for so long. In my hiatus (of leaving the relationship) she stayed steadfast in the fact that we should be together. I left her, tried something else, but she remained. I apologize to her for the tears that flowed because of me. Oh my goodness!
I am ready. I am ready to settle down giving myself to her. She is the one. She is my friend first. I tell her the truth. She sees me as I am, and she loves me as is. I am happy. It is time to tell her. I love you!
I've been playing the field. I'm willing to give myself to her. Yes, her. She is the one that allow me to be myself. She understands that I need my space and gives it to me. She does not call me when I am out late. All she asks is that I come home. Home. That is where she is. She created this home for me. I took her for granted for so long. In my hiatus (of leaving the relationship) she stayed steadfast in the fact that we should be together. I left her, tried something else, but she remained. I apologize to her for the tears that flowed because of me. Oh my goodness!
I am ready. I am ready to settle down giving myself to her. She is the one. She is my friend first. I tell her the truth. She sees me as I am, and she loves me as is. I am happy. It is time to tell her. I love you!
Saturday, June 13, 2009
CHOICES!
Yesterday I met one of my good friends' girlfriend for the first time. We talked about her future after receiving her Master's in Entertainment Business. She talked about how she ONLY did a few projects and was not ready for the 'big time.' My heart laughed and frowned at the same time. I remembered when I used to say that ALL THE TIME. I remembered when I didn't glorify my Divine gifts as Divine. I remembered when I chose out of default. This wasn't but a short time ago that I didn't truly acknowledge how wonderful I am.
Sometimes I used to second guess myself about everything because I did not feel I deserved it. I wanted it, but why me? I'm asking myself why not me now because I've accepted that I am a Divine representation. All that is Divine is me. I am wonderful. I am intelligent. I am compassionate. I am loving. I've learned that I have to make choices accordingly. I refuse to live by default. I am going out and just doing it. Even in failure and setbacks I'm learning and growing. If I become stagnant that I lose myself into defeat.
I understand her (my friend's girlfriend) resistant to change. I've learned that the only constant is change. Change will occur even if she initiate it or doesn't. Living by default is not fun because I hate feeling regretful. Today's lesson is to choose. Having a choice is the greatest thing about being human. Even if you choose wrong you can learn from it. Then you can choose something else. You're growing as a person. When you allow a situation choose you, you're living by default. Then you're in reactionary mode. Life is a series of choices. Today I choose to live life and love like I've never have. Today I choose to go out and get what I want. Today I choose to see the truth. Today I choose to let go and let God. Today I choose to be the person I was born to be.
Sometimes I used to second guess myself about everything because I did not feel I deserved it. I wanted it, but why me? I'm asking myself why not me now because I've accepted that I am a Divine representation. All that is Divine is me. I am wonderful. I am intelligent. I am compassionate. I am loving. I've learned that I have to make choices accordingly. I refuse to live by default. I am going out and just doing it. Even in failure and setbacks I'm learning and growing. If I become stagnant that I lose myself into defeat.
I understand her (my friend's girlfriend) resistant to change. I've learned that the only constant is change. Change will occur even if she initiate it or doesn't. Living by default is not fun because I hate feeling regretful. Today's lesson is to choose. Having a choice is the greatest thing about being human. Even if you choose wrong you can learn from it. Then you can choose something else. You're growing as a person. When you allow a situation choose you, you're living by default. Then you're in reactionary mode. Life is a series of choices. Today I choose to live life and love like I've never have. Today I choose to go out and get what I want. Today I choose to see the truth. Today I choose to let go and let God. Today I choose to be the person I was born to be.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Celebrating Small Victories
This morning I woke up at 3:00am. I got back in bed, but my body was not resting. I started to think about my day. I go to work for 7:00am to 3:30pm. Then I have to go see The Hangover with my little brother, and one of my friends is in town this weekend. I rolled over and got up. Yes, I got up and went to the gym for over two hours. I did an hour of cardio and then worked on chest and biceps. I am very proud of myself. I could have gone back to bed. Then I would have hated myself tomorrow. I have to make those choices to be better and do better because I am working on my body, mind and soul.
One thing I've learned is to acceptance. I've learned to accept both good and bad. I can change the bad, but I have to accept the fact the bad is in my life. According to Iyanla Vanzant, 'acceptance is a sign of courage.' It is courageous to acknowledge something bad about yourself. This acceptance allows me to make a conscious choice to change. One thing I know is the only constant is change. Might as well make that change for the better. The next thing I need to work on is patience with myself and with desired results as I continue to work on my body, mind and soul.
By acknowledging this morning I am celebrating a small victory. By reading this morning I celebrate a small victory. By writing this I am celebrating a small victory. It's sometimes good to acknowledge yourself and your small victories to continue on the path of enlightenment. We are all on our own personal journeys. While traveling on this road to enlightenment we must accept the fact that we are Divine representations. When bumps in the road appear we must trust our abilities to overcome them. For me it's cardio at the gym. I hate it, but I keep my eyes on the prize. I may not have my six-pack right now, but I have to trust the fact that if I continue to eat right, work out rigorously and consistently that I will get my desired result. What's a small victory you can celebrate?
One thing I've learned is to acceptance. I've learned to accept both good and bad. I can change the bad, but I have to accept the fact the bad is in my life. According to Iyanla Vanzant, 'acceptance is a sign of courage.' It is courageous to acknowledge something bad about yourself. This acceptance allows me to make a conscious choice to change. One thing I know is the only constant is change. Might as well make that change for the better. The next thing I need to work on is patience with myself and with desired results as I continue to work on my body, mind and soul.
By acknowledging this morning I am celebrating a small victory. By reading this morning I celebrate a small victory. By writing this I am celebrating a small victory. It's sometimes good to acknowledge yourself and your small victories to continue on the path of enlightenment. We are all on our own personal journeys. While traveling on this road to enlightenment we must accept the fact that we are Divine representations. When bumps in the road appear we must trust our abilities to overcome them. For me it's cardio at the gym. I hate it, but I keep my eyes on the prize. I may not have my six-pack right now, but I have to trust the fact that if I continue to eat right, work out rigorously and consistently that I will get my desired result. What's a small victory you can celebrate?
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
The Reason Why I Write
A few months ago I reunited with an old friend. It was crazy. I was at one of my old hangouts that day when she came to town. I hadn't seen that friend in over five years. Well, we started talking about how she started writing a blog about her 'top 35 things to do before 35.' She said that if we wrote it on a blog that we would make each other more responsible about our dreams and making them a reality. I agreed so I wrote mine. It was empowering. We read each other's. We gave each other encouragement about making our dreams a reality because some of the 'things' were things we had to overcome some fears to do.
Then something else happened. I got addicted to writing in my blog. I felt like I had something to say. For once in my life I felt what I had to say mattered. We often go through life like we don't matter. I wrote for me. My blog is to get my thoughts and dreams out of my head and make it tangible for everyone to see. It's crazy. I didn't write it for others. However, if it helps someone else to know that they are not alone in their thoughts and feelings, I am becoming a vessel. I am a Divine vessel. As this vessel I can show how great the Divine is if we believe and trust in something that is bigger than us. Sometimes our ego gets in the way and we think our current state will be permanent. Nothing is permanent. It does not have to be. As the old saying goes, "The only constant is change."
We can change our current state by changing our perspective. For if our current state is not where we want it to be, change your attitude and start doing better for yourself. It's alright sometimes to ask for help. The Divine is always listening and always answers your prayers. Don't forget to be patient because the Divine works on Divine time, not yours. Again, be patient and let the Divine work as needed. Trust in the Divine for what you need. That's what I've been doing with this blog. Every day I write, and I begin to see me for what I am. That's a Divine representation. I am Divinely human becoming a 'working perfection' as Ossie Davis said. So I write today and almost every day to show how open, honest and Divine I am. This is the reason I write.
Then something else happened. I got addicted to writing in my blog. I felt like I had something to say. For once in my life I felt what I had to say mattered. We often go through life like we don't matter. I wrote for me. My blog is to get my thoughts and dreams out of my head and make it tangible for everyone to see. It's crazy. I didn't write it for others. However, if it helps someone else to know that they are not alone in their thoughts and feelings, I am becoming a vessel. I am a Divine vessel. As this vessel I can show how great the Divine is if we believe and trust in something that is bigger than us. Sometimes our ego gets in the way and we think our current state will be permanent. Nothing is permanent. It does not have to be. As the old saying goes, "The only constant is change."
We can change our current state by changing our perspective. For if our current state is not where we want it to be, change your attitude and start doing better for yourself. It's alright sometimes to ask for help. The Divine is always listening and always answers your prayers. Don't forget to be patient because the Divine works on Divine time, not yours. Again, be patient and let the Divine work as needed. Trust in the Divine for what you need. That's what I've been doing with this blog. Every day I write, and I begin to see me for what I am. That's a Divine representation. I am Divinely human becoming a 'working perfection' as Ossie Davis said. So I write today and almost every day to show how open, honest and Divine I am. This is the reason I write.
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Distinguish between Opportunities
About a month ago I talked to a the manager of Whiskey Blue about doing a LGBT (Lesbians, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender) event at his spot. We talked and talked, and my event was transformed into something different. I was happy about the opportunity to meet him because Whiskey Blue is a respectable, upscale club in the New Orleans area. As I talked it over with my business partners, I realized it wasn't our vision anymore. We became something different. For a second I became what I didn't want to become like the rest of the promoters in New Orleans, fakers.
Eyes Wide Open - New Orleans is a promotion company that cares about clientele it is servicing. I am a member of this group. As I have a lot of friends that are heterosexuals, there are still some things that they do not get because they do not live it. My heterosexuals can and have empathize with me but along the way it becomes sympathy. I don't need sympathy. I am not belittling my friendships, but sometimes they don't understand. It's ok. For sometimes I want to go to the gay/lesbian club, many do not feel comfortable so I don't ask. Enough about them my focus for EWO - NOLA is LGBT members. LGBT members are often castaways. However, they are economic volcano waiting to explode. In case you didn't know, LGBT members and heterosexual people have a big disparity between disposable income with LGBT 'coming out' on top. Statistics show this.
As a member of the LGBT community I cannot water down our events for profits. This is something that is close to my heart. I have to be careful when making business decisions. I realized that Whiskey Blue was not good for the first place for Eyes Wide Open - New Orleans. That gives me more time with the behind-the-scenes shaninigans. I have to go to my maps, others before me, to make this work. I want the haters to come out because that means I'm doing something right. It's time for me to work on this plan. Things will fall into place with prayer, meditation and action. Prayer + Meditation + Action = Results. Even with unfavorable results I can learn what I should do and what shouldn't I do. Let the journey continue.
Eyes Wide Open - New Orleans is a promotion company that cares about clientele it is servicing. I am a member of this group. As I have a lot of friends that are heterosexuals, there are still some things that they do not get because they do not live it. My heterosexuals can and have empathize with me but along the way it becomes sympathy. I don't need sympathy. I am not belittling my friendships, but sometimes they don't understand. It's ok. For sometimes I want to go to the gay/lesbian club, many do not feel comfortable so I don't ask. Enough about them my focus for EWO - NOLA is LGBT members. LGBT members are often castaways. However, they are economic volcano waiting to explode. In case you didn't know, LGBT members and heterosexual people have a big disparity between disposable income with LGBT 'coming out' on top. Statistics show this.
As a member of the LGBT community I cannot water down our events for profits. This is something that is close to my heart. I have to be careful when making business decisions. I realized that Whiskey Blue was not good for the first place for Eyes Wide Open - New Orleans. That gives me more time with the behind-the-scenes shaninigans. I have to go to my maps, others before me, to make this work. I want the haters to come out because that means I'm doing something right. It's time for me to work on this plan. Things will fall into place with prayer, meditation and action. Prayer + Meditation + Action = Results. Even with unfavorable results I can learn what I should do and what shouldn't I do. Let the journey continue.
Monday, June 8, 2009
Finding Your Passion
I wake up in the morning and sometimes I dread going to work. But then I find my way back to it. I love the interaction between people (good/bad). I figured out I was a people person. Sometimes I am not passionate about my current job. I feel bad about it, but then I realize that I am a working perfection. Since going to a new job I am steadfast about my decisions. I am being more authoritative. I am in more command. I practicing skills that I need to master to run my own company. This is all a process that will get me to wonderful results.
For years I could not find my passion because I was good at many things. I was good at math. I went to the University of Oklahoma to get an Engineering degree. I love music. I hate hand-to-hand promotions. It seems that's where everyone has to start. STOP! I am making excuses. I have to realize that I have to start somewhere. I love interaction between myself and others. Use this as an attribute in my endeavors. If I want to do event promotions as a full-time job, I have to start with a map. Others have succeeded and failed. I have to ask both to tell their stories. Use the maps to steer me in the right direction.
Did I say that? I love music. I love all kinds of music. I buy music on a weekly basis. I read about the musicians. I learn about their inspirations. That inspires me. My favorite album of all-time is John Coltrane's A Love Supreme. John Coltrane was passionate about his saxophone and to recreate music. There were others before him, but he used his 'special skills' to separate himself from the others. Almost every saxophone since he has graced the earth says that John Coltrane is one of their musical heroes. John Coltrane left his imprint on music. He found his passion.
I am passionate about music. I love jazz. I love soul music. I love hip-hop. I love some rock. I love some alternative. I like some country. I even like some heavy metal. New Orleans is a music city. However, we do not have music business as it should be. My passion is make New Orleans a prominent city for not only music but for music business. Every major concert has to stop here. We should have more music festivals during the summer i.e. Chicago. We should cultivate our music and musicians i.e. Atlanta. We should represent our city harder than anyone i.e. New York. I have work to do, but I've found my passion. When my dream a reality, I just want you to know that I told you so.
For years I could not find my passion because I was good at many things. I was good at math. I went to the University of Oklahoma to get an Engineering degree. I love music. I hate hand-to-hand promotions. It seems that's where everyone has to start. STOP! I am making excuses. I have to realize that I have to start somewhere. I love interaction between myself and others. Use this as an attribute in my endeavors. If I want to do event promotions as a full-time job, I have to start with a map. Others have succeeded and failed. I have to ask both to tell their stories. Use the maps to steer me in the right direction.
Did I say that? I love music. I love all kinds of music. I buy music on a weekly basis. I read about the musicians. I learn about their inspirations. That inspires me. My favorite album of all-time is John Coltrane's A Love Supreme. John Coltrane was passionate about his saxophone and to recreate music. There were others before him, but he used his 'special skills' to separate himself from the others. Almost every saxophone since he has graced the earth says that John Coltrane is one of their musical heroes. John Coltrane left his imprint on music. He found his passion.
I am passionate about music. I love jazz. I love soul music. I love hip-hop. I love some rock. I love some alternative. I like some country. I even like some heavy metal. New Orleans is a music city. However, we do not have music business as it should be. My passion is make New Orleans a prominent city for not only music but for music business. Every major concert has to stop here. We should have more music festivals during the summer i.e. Chicago. We should cultivate our music and musicians i.e. Atlanta. We should represent our city harder than anyone i.e. New York. I have work to do, but I've found my passion. When my dream a reality, I just want you to know that I told you so.
Sunday, June 7, 2009
Start Where You Are
Often we forget that we have talents, knowledge and resources in our current state. We often look at what we do not have instead of what we do. Often we focus on the lack of than the plentiful we have. Our cup is always half full. The positivity have to overpower the negativity to get to your rightful place in life. It took me thirty-two years to realize that I have so much to offer as a person, friend, and lover. The Divine wants you to do well, but you have to go through a journey of trials and tribulations to show your strength and perserverance. Yes, you are one of the Divine's greatest creations. I am, too. That's why we have to get up and start where you are.
Take inventory of your talents, knowledge and resources. Start with what you have and go from there. There will be bumps in the road. They are not roadblocks. You can maneuver around these. Keep praying and meditating. Be patient. We just have to 'get up' as Mary Mary sings and do what we need to do. If we stop trying, we will never get to where we want. It's like working out. If we stop working out, we will never get to the desired result that we want. We have to celebrate the small victories as well as the big ones. Every twenty-four hours should be a continuance of your journey. You should be closer to your goals every day. That's what I am working on. I am reading, praying, meditating, and doing to fulfill to my personal, business and spiritual goals.
I am getting closer and closer to my personal and spiritual goals. I am loving myself with such greatness. I wish I could kiss myself (LOL!). I am such a wonderful person. My relationship with the Divine is stronger because I am letting the Divine to take the lead in my life. If I do not have any friends, I have the Divine. The Divine loves me so much that I have great family and friends in my life. I don't have to name them because they know who they are. I am truly blessed. I don't get on my knees as much as I should, but I pray every day to the Divine . I pray for strength, wisdom and courage to get through each day. My goal is to be better than the day before. I am on my way. Thank you!
Take inventory of your talents, knowledge and resources. Start with what you have and go from there. There will be bumps in the road. They are not roadblocks. You can maneuver around these. Keep praying and meditating. Be patient. We just have to 'get up' as Mary Mary sings and do what we need to do. If we stop trying, we will never get to where we want. It's like working out. If we stop working out, we will never get to the desired result that we want. We have to celebrate the small victories as well as the big ones. Every twenty-four hours should be a continuance of your journey. You should be closer to your goals every day. That's what I am working on. I am reading, praying, meditating, and doing to fulfill to my personal, business and spiritual goals.
I am getting closer and closer to my personal and spiritual goals. I am loving myself with such greatness. I wish I could kiss myself (LOL!). I am such a wonderful person. My relationship with the Divine is stronger because I am letting the Divine to take the lead in my life. If I do not have any friends, I have the Divine. The Divine loves me so much that I have great family and friends in my life. I don't have to name them because they know who they are. I am truly blessed. I don't get on my knees as much as I should, but I pray every day to the Divine . I pray for strength, wisdom and courage to get through each day. My goal is to be better than the day before. I am on my way. Thank you!
Saturday, June 6, 2009
A Moment of Clarity
Tears flowed not for the love lost but for the love gained. I'd realized I had to let her go to begin loving again. I put all my eggs in one basket. I'm sorry, MawMaw. My grandmother told me to never put all my eggs in one basket. I had too many eggs in that basket, and it would eventually break. By letting go it allows my heart to open up to new possibilities. I cannot look back and just look at the mistakes I have made. This is my journey. My life is unfolding as it should. I have to put TRUST in the Divine to give me what I need when I need it. I cannot worry about things I ultimately do not have any control over.
This brings me back to the Serenity Prayer. I've read the Serenity Prayer over and over taking it as is. Doing research for the blog I discovered that Karl Paul Reinhold Niebuhr reportedly wrote it in 1926. Niebuhr was a Lutheran pastor and theologian. Usually we only read the first two verses of the prayer, but the whole prayer adds to the transformative power of words.
GOD, grant me the serenity
to accept the things
I cannot change,
Courage to change the
things I can, and the
wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardship as the
pathway to peace.
Taking, as the Divine did, this
sinful world as it is,
not as I would have it.
Trusting that the Divine will make
all things right if I
surrender to the Divine's Will;
That I may be reasonably happy
in this life, and supremely
happy with the Divine forever in
the next.
Amen
These words are transformative. My being feels brand new. I can take on the world without regards to the negativity. It's there but why should it dominate your mind. It is true about me, and it is true about you. It is also true that we have created a pretty ugly world. There's a simple correction process to this way of thinking. Start each day by seeing it in the way you would want it to be. See yourself handling everything in life with grace and effectively. Be patient with yourself when the results you want don't come on your time clock. Don't forget that you're living on the Divine's time. The Divine is always on time. There will be days that your ego will show back up. You will get angry, afraid, and sometimes just hateful. Remember where you are, pray to the Divine and then calm down.
Once you calm down think about the situation and learn from it. Understand why you got angry, afraid or hateful. You may have to avoid that situation until you're emotionally ready to deal with it. It's ok to know your limitations which are none. There's infinite possibilities, for we are made in the image of the Divine. Don't forget this! While those tears flowed the other day I had an epiphany. For the first time I listened to the Divine through my temporary insanity. A moment of clarity invaded my being. For the first time in a long time I was free. My thoughts of what love should be shackled my ability to actually love. Now I am free, and love is flowing abound.
This brings me back to the Serenity Prayer. I've read the Serenity Prayer over and over taking it as is. Doing research for the blog I discovered that Karl Paul Reinhold Niebuhr reportedly wrote it in 1926. Niebuhr was a Lutheran pastor and theologian. Usually we only read the first two verses of the prayer, but the whole prayer adds to the transformative power of words.
GOD, grant me the serenity
to accept the things
I cannot change,
Courage to change the
things I can, and the
wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardship as the
pathway to peace.
Taking, as the Divine did, this
sinful world as it is,
not as I would have it.
Trusting that the Divine will make
all things right if I
surrender to the Divine's Will;
That I may be reasonably happy
in this life, and supremely
happy with the Divine forever in
the next.
Amen
These words are transformative. My being feels brand new. I can take on the world without regards to the negativity. It's there but why should it dominate your mind. It is true about me, and it is true about you. It is also true that we have created a pretty ugly world. There's a simple correction process to this way of thinking. Start each day by seeing it in the way you would want it to be. See yourself handling everything in life with grace and effectively. Be patient with yourself when the results you want don't come on your time clock. Don't forget that you're living on the Divine's time. The Divine is always on time. There will be days that your ego will show back up. You will get angry, afraid, and sometimes just hateful. Remember where you are, pray to the Divine and then calm down.
Once you calm down think about the situation and learn from it. Understand why you got angry, afraid or hateful. You may have to avoid that situation until you're emotionally ready to deal with it. It's ok to know your limitations which are none. There's infinite possibilities, for we are made in the image of the Divine. Don't forget this! While those tears flowed the other day I had an epiphany. For the first time I listened to the Divine through my temporary insanity. A moment of clarity invaded my being. For the first time in a long time I was free. My thoughts of what love should be shackled my ability to actually love. Now I am free, and love is flowing abound.
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Do Not Hate! Congratulate!
Yesterday my status on Facebook was 'A. Kenyatta Parks doesn't hate on anyone because there's no blessings in that!' While I have been focusing on what others do or do not do, I have to put all of my energies in making me better. I say leave the hateration to the haters. Leave that negativity to the negative people. You do not want to get sucked in that negativity because people will bring you down with them. This crab mentality permeates our society in every aspect. Instead of enjoying your journey as is we want to keep up with the Joneses. I'm tired of comparing myself to anyone because there's only one Anisa Kenyatta Parks. I am the unique representation of the Divine. I have to act according to Divine laws. I have to remember those old sayings like 'Do unto others as you would have them do unto you' or 'Believe your first mind.' But essentially you will not receive blessings because due to someone else's misfortunes. Put your energies in yourself and stop the hating. The world would be a better place if we focused on our shortcomings instead of others.
I will not lie to you and said that I didn't have any hateration in my heart. Yes, I did. I especially used to hate when someone chose another over me. I often looked at what they didn't have and not what they were bringing to the table. I've learned that if it's not meant to be... move on. While we were are harping on the love lost, we can build up our self-love. When you love yourself, others flock to you because they want that positive energy in their life. No one likes to be around a person that is always complaining. There's always something to be joyful. When we wake up in the morning we should be joyful because we can change every day. We can pray and meditate about making our situation better. We can literally go from rags to riches, but it doesn't matter if we do not have faith in something bigger than you.
I write this having to apologize to many who I've hated on. I am human. I will probably do it again but not proudly. I will learn from this hating and focus on ME! Every day I write, read, pray and meditate to find the answers to my journey's questions. My affirmations help me against hating. I don't want to have something because someone lost but because I won. I cannot celebrate someone else's defeat, but I definitely will celebrate my victory. My victory is a result of patience, knowledge, wisdom and action. Victory will be mine.
In my victory I will have to congratulate my opponents for being formidable. They will drive me to do my best and hopefully vice-versa. Stop hating, for it's not productive. Congratulate with a love in your heart. It is then that we grow into the Divine beings we are.
I will not lie to you and said that I didn't have any hateration in my heart. Yes, I did. I especially used to hate when someone chose another over me. I often looked at what they didn't have and not what they were bringing to the table. I've learned that if it's not meant to be... move on. While we were are harping on the love lost, we can build up our self-love. When you love yourself, others flock to you because they want that positive energy in their life. No one likes to be around a person that is always complaining. There's always something to be joyful. When we wake up in the morning we should be joyful because we can change every day. We can pray and meditate about making our situation better. We can literally go from rags to riches, but it doesn't matter if we do not have faith in something bigger than you.
I write this having to apologize to many who I've hated on. I am human. I will probably do it again but not proudly. I will learn from this hating and focus on ME! Every day I write, read, pray and meditate to find the answers to my journey's questions. My affirmations help me against hating. I don't want to have something because someone lost but because I won. I cannot celebrate someone else's defeat, but I definitely will celebrate my victory. My victory is a result of patience, knowledge, wisdom and action. Victory will be mine.
In my victory I will have to congratulate my opponents for being formidable. They will drive me to do my best and hopefully vice-versa. Stop hating, for it's not productive. Congratulate with a love in your heart. It is then that we grow into the Divine beings we are.
The Art of Loving
For years I disguised my need for love with sex. Anything I need to know about sex I learned from books, partners and friends. If I couldn't do anything else, I knew how to (you know). About six years ago I realized that I wanted more. I was twenty-six and hadn't been in a meaningful relationship. Depression set in. Questions of 'what was wrong with me' and 'why doesn't anybody love me' entered my head. As I thought about it I realized that I didn't learn about love like I wanted to learn about sex. I didn't attack love as a subject and working extension of me. I often associated love with a mushy, touchy feely kind of thing that wasn't me.
Now I can courageously claim the search for love as an heroic journey we all must choose to be truly free. For I need to be free from my past, the self-defeating image of my body, and the notion that no one can love me. I have to continue to independently love myself as I am and change the things I want. By embracing myself as someone to love others can see and want to be around someone full of joy and enlightenment. This journey is personal and prescriptive as well as passionate and provoking. This journey of self-love guides me toward a path that leads to true fulfillment.
As I enter into a realm where I truly love myself I can celebrate the art of loving as it is. I can love freely without boundaries or definitions. When I speak of love, it's not pretty sometimes. The truth hurts sometimes and in any loving relationship you have to be truthful. If we love we cannot allow the 'ego' to get in the way. We have to love with our body, mind and soul. We have to love as the Divine loves us unconditionally. For we have to understand that love is a one-way street. Just because we love doesn't mean that we will be loved in return. Understand this for all we need is the love of the Divine and self-love. We are worthy of love because we are born into this world. We are created as the image of the Divine. We are love personified. Now I continue on my journey for self-love.
Now I can courageously claim the search for love as an heroic journey we all must choose to be truly free. For I need to be free from my past, the self-defeating image of my body, and the notion that no one can love me. I have to continue to independently love myself as I am and change the things I want. By embracing myself as someone to love others can see and want to be around someone full of joy and enlightenment. This journey is personal and prescriptive as well as passionate and provoking. This journey of self-love guides me toward a path that leads to true fulfillment.
As I enter into a realm where I truly love myself I can celebrate the art of loving as it is. I can love freely without boundaries or definitions. When I speak of love, it's not pretty sometimes. The truth hurts sometimes and in any loving relationship you have to be truthful. If we love we cannot allow the 'ego' to get in the way. We have to love with our body, mind and soul. We have to love as the Divine loves us unconditionally. For we have to understand that love is a one-way street. Just because we love doesn't mean that we will be loved in return. Understand this for all we need is the love of the Divine and self-love. We are worthy of love because we are born into this world. We are created as the image of the Divine. We are love personified. Now I continue on my journey for self-love.
Monday, June 1, 2009
Being Joyful
Good morning! This is a new day to put action to my words. I wake up today with a new sense of joy. I am joyful to being alive. This is a new day to change how I am into the woman I was born to be. Every day is a blessing because every day I can learn from the past and elevate my game. Unlike Lebron James I do not need a team to win a championship. I will win when I know I am free from all of the bullshyt of denial, fear and pain. When my first choice is love, faith and hope I've overcame and won. This is an internal process that I cannot allow anyone to deter me from. I have to understand that I cannot share myself with anyone until I know what I have to share. I've been getting down on myself about not being in committed relationship in my 30s. I have to have an intimate relationship with myself before I can truly commit to someone else. I understand that. I am fully aware of my faults. I want to change, and today is a new day. I have the ability to change. I have to be patient with myself, but permanent change will not happen overnight. I have to give myself leeway (more like an inch not a mile).
I'm looking outside my window, and it will be a beautiful day not because the sun is shining or the clouds are not gray. It's the day. It's understanding that my light shines from within outward. It's understanding that nothing can deter me from changing except me. I cannot blame anything. Accepting responsibility is not the same accepting guilt. We cannot be guilty about being human. It's a process. We all have different journeys. We cannot be jealous of the next man's journey, for he/she may have something you have and vice versa. For example I may look at a friend and say he has it all (cars, houses, money, etc), and he look at me and say I have it all (peace, love, self-awareness). When you look at someone you cannot look at the monetary things. Like my grandmother said, "You cannot bring your gold with you to heaven." Work on the things that you can control (your actions), have faith in the Divine and let the chips fall where they may. Trust the Divine and know that you have everything that you need at any particular given time.
Once you have the trust in Divine Order, you can have that joy in your heart that tells you that you will be ok. My boy Terance stated that he "often wonder how someone can rejoice or be joyful all the time especially during difficult experiences? Unlike happiness which is based on circumstances, joy is a positive and confident outlook on life despite our circumstances. Knowing that Divine is in control and that love surrounds us gives security and confidence. No matter what happens, we should (have) delight in the Divine and praise the Divine for the goodness we have." I leave you with that!
I'm looking outside my window, and it will be a beautiful day not because the sun is shining or the clouds are not gray. It's the day. It's understanding that my light shines from within outward. It's understanding that nothing can deter me from changing except me. I cannot blame anything. Accepting responsibility is not the same accepting guilt. We cannot be guilty about being human. It's a process. We all have different journeys. We cannot be jealous of the next man's journey, for he/she may have something you have and vice versa. For example I may look at a friend and say he has it all (cars, houses, money, etc), and he look at me and say I have it all (peace, love, self-awareness). When you look at someone you cannot look at the monetary things. Like my grandmother said, "You cannot bring your gold with you to heaven." Work on the things that you can control (your actions), have faith in the Divine and let the chips fall where they may. Trust the Divine and know that you have everything that you need at any particular given time.
Once you have the trust in Divine Order, you can have that joy in your heart that tells you that you will be ok. My boy Terance stated that he "often wonder how someone can rejoice or be joyful all the time especially during difficult experiences? Unlike happiness which is based on circumstances, joy is a positive and confident outlook on life despite our circumstances. Knowing that Divine is in control and that love surrounds us gives security and confidence. No matter what happens, we should (have) delight in the Divine and praise the Divine for the goodness we have." I leave you with that!
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